Abuse Is Wrong In Any Culture: Inuit
Is it better to stay or leave?
You have to think first about your safety, and the safety of your children.
You may choose to leave for a short time, or even permanently. Neither choice means you have to end your marriage or relationship.
You might be afraid that your family and friends will blame you for "breaking up the family." And they might. It's a hard choice. But hiding the actions of the abuser does not help that person to heal. And leaving children to learn violence is normal will affect their future as well.
If you are uncomfortable or feel unsafe, then you are likely in an abusive relationship. If you have been battered once, it will likely get worse, not better, unless you do something to stop it.
First, make sure you and your children are safe. In making your decision, ask yourself:
- Has he threatened to kill me or the children?
- Is he getting more violent each time?
- Has he forced me to have sex?
- Has he threatened suicide?
- Is he very controlling or jealous?
- Has he ever used a weapon, like a knife, stick, or gun to hurt me?
- Does he take drugs or drink a lot?
- Am I taking drugs or drinking to deal with the pain?
- Am I afraid for my children?
- Are my friends and family afraid for me?
- How is this tension and violence affecting me and my kids?
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